Sunday, January 16, 2011

January 16th-January 22nd's Challenge: Eating

Darth Vader's suits is one of the coolest things ever invented. It makes everybody wish that they too were mutilated by their best friend in an overly long lightsaber fight in the middle of a volcano. It's because Vader finds the bright side to everything. Even after he chopped off Luke's hand, he knew that his son's administrative abilities wouldn't be seriously handicapped by the loss of his right appendage and graciously offered him the position of Second in Command. Luke hadn't learned how to make lemonade out of lemons and dropped down the shaft like a wuss.

Despite how cool Vader's suit is though, it presents a few unique challenges. Like, how does he eat? It's not like he can just take off his mask every time. At the end of Return of the Jedi when Luke took off the mask, it took like five minutes. Vader doesn't have that kind of time. The only method of eating we can think of is blending is food into a smoothie and sticking a straw up through his ventilator.

Now, the challenge is not to blend your food up and eat it through a ventilator (though if you did, it would be worth many points; see below). The challenge is to step outside of the normal eating paradigms in public, just to show the world that you, like Vader, don't need to eat like a normal person in order to be respected and feared. Videos must be submitted for maximum points.

A highly detailed account about what weird eating thing you did in public, and the reactions that you got: 1 point
A video of you eating weirdly in public: 3 points at minimum, but more depending on how awesome you are
And now for the mother load. If you take a video of yourself blending your meal up into a smoothie, and drink it through a straw that's going through the slats of these sunglasses*, congratulations, you're the proud owner of 15 points. The video has to include you putting the food into the blender so that we know that you ate something gross and that you're not some smoothie sucking fraud.

*On some parts of the internet, these sunglasses are referred to as "Kanye West Sunglasses." Since Kanye West is a useless tool bag, anyone who refers to the sunglasses in such a manner will revoke all point claiming privileges and be banished from the Daily Challenge, forever.

Monday, November 1, 2010

November 2nd, 2010's challenge: The Laugh

For the record, the sign that we put up is still there, advertising Vader and all his glory. Since we've been basking in this success, perhaps this is why new challenges have been scarce lately. And probably because no one actually does the challenges either. Anyways, to the challenge.

Lots of things in life are funny. Like this video if you watch from 2:50 to 2:59. But there are times and places there things shouldn't be funny. There are times and places where laughing is the exact wrong response. This is the challenge. Find a place where a group of people are forced to be around you, like a public bathroom, a line at a grocery store, during a lecture, or whatever, and laugh. Loud and long and clear, and for no apparent reason. The raunchier and more ridiculous the laugh is, the better. As usual, this all must be video taped.

Outrageous laugh in a conspicuous and painfully public place: 3 points.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

October 28th, 2010's challenge: The Plug

We all like to be recognized. Darth Vader is no different. He wants people to visit his website.

Fortunately, when opportunity knocks, Vader is ready with a force choke. There is, in the Wilkinson Center, near the bookstore entrance that's by the Cougareat, a reasonable facsimile of Lord Vader himself, in cardboard cut out form. He's currently advertising for something to do with children. Does that seem right to you?

Our goal, as the Arbiters, is to add a speech bubble to plug the Daily Challenge, to spread the influence of the Empire. Everyone else's goal is to put up a Vader themed sign around their neighborhood or whatever, advertising the site for Lord Vader. Take a picture of your advertisement, and post it on the site.

Picture of a Vader-tastic ad for the website: 2 points.

Monday, October 25, 2010

October 26th, 2010's challenge: Submit the Challenge

It's occurred to us that there is a disparity between the points of long time players and newcomers. There's also a problem with our ability to come up with new challenges. In order to rectify both of these problems, we, the Triumvirate of Arbiters, are opening the channels. Give us some awesome ideas, and we'll give you points.

Scores:

Each idea: 1 point
Each good idea: 2 points
Each awesome idea: 3 points.

There's a cap of 9 points possible. Happy brainstorming

Sunday, October 24, 2010

October 24th, 2010's challenge: The Rick Roll

Vader is a master of recreating things. When the first Death Star blew up, that didn't stop Vader from building a newer, better one. As a child, he made C-3PO, and as a young adult, he made Luke and Leia. To be like Vader we all need to become masters of creation, recreation, and procreation.

The thing that Vader wants everyone to recreate today is the Rick Roll. For the uninitiated, a Rick Roll is when you click on a link for a video or whatever, but instead of getting the video you want, you get a video of Rick Astley singing this song.

The challenge for today is to drive by someone with Rick playing, and then slow down to the point where you're driving side by side the pedestrian. Then, don't look at them or acknowledge them in any way. Just let them be Rick rolled.

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Rick rolling someone: 5
Rick rolling the same person twice: 7
Rick rolling the same person three times 9

Happy rolling.

Friday, October 22, 2010

October 22nd, 2010's Challenge: Stall Escape

Due to the nature of doing Babylon midterm essays until 2:45 in the morning, the challenge has been late in arriving, and so in his clemency Lord Vader will allow all willing participants to complete this challenge both today and tomorrow.

Vader is a man who learns from his mistakes. Trying to jump over Obi-Wan during a lightsaber fight? Did he ever try that one again? Have you noticed just how grounded he remains in New Hope? When the second Death Star is getting created, did they leave open a vent that some rebel could shoot a proton torpedo into? No way. Vader is a man with plan B's.

Today's challenge is to climb over the stall wall in a public bathroom, and to get it on video. It's similar to a fire drill. It's to show Vader that, if under pressure, you have the gumption and the bravery necessary to overcome any challenge. So, pretend that the door is locked (but don't slide under the stall on the bathroom floor, because that plan is gross) and climb over that stall.

The scoring system:

Video of you climbing over a stall in public: 5 points
Video of you climbing over a stall in public, with an excess of weird grunts and noises: 6 points
Doing both of those without a shirt on: 8 points

Happy climbing.

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Wednesday, October 20, 2010

October 21st, 2010's Challenge: High Fives

The siege has always been an effective military tactic, because people need food to survive. Being the master tactician that he is, Lord Vader always strives to foster a spirit of brotherhood among grocery store employees due to the their access to vast supplies of food. By having friends at grocery store chains, Vader is thus protected from someone trying to besiege him and also has the possibility of laying siege to his enemies, should it come to that.

Lord Vader also knows that he's getting old, and that soon he will have to pass on his throne to a worthy successor. Being the Christian that he is, Vader knows the parable that says that "he who is faithful over few things shall be made ruler over many things," and in keeping with this principle, one of the determining factors for who his successor will be is their love displayed towards grocery store cashiers. This is why for tomorrow, Vader wants to see everyone give a grocery store clerk a high five, and not only that, but also capture the moment on film, without them being aware that they're on camera. There is no room in the empire for scripted love. Vader wants to see the genuine article, and wants the videos posted on this, his illustrious site. It might help to bring a friend, who can record secretly while you give high fives openly.

The scoring:

Video of a clerk being high fived: 5 points
Video of a clerk getting double high fived: 6 points.
Video of you hugging a clerk: 10 points

Happy hunting.

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